Weekly WND Mash-Up

Because throbbing temple pain is best when shared.

- Dennis Prager claims to have discovered deep American values from going through his loose change:

I only came to realize what these values are in the way medical researchers sometimes happen upon a major discovery – by chance. One night, as I emptied my pockets, I stared at the coins I had removed, and, lo and behold, there they were: America’s values. The designers of all of America’s money – paper and coin – had been telling me and every other American for well over a century what America stood for. And I hadn’t noticed:
 “Liberty,” “In God We Trust,” and “E Pluribus Unum” (“From Many, One”).

Uh huh. Good thing there were no Sacajewa dollars or this might have turned into a rant about PC pandering mucking up the integrity of our precious currency. I like how Dennis is bragging about all his profound thoughts being collected in a new book and yet apparently his deepest insights come from bumping into random objects. He's like Andy Rooney with no sense of humor or self-awareness. "I can't think of a better example of American values than potato salad. Cubed potatoes, creamy mayo, slivered bits of egg, and just a hint of acidity from some pickle relish. E Pluribus Unum indeed!"

- Patrice Lewis "proves" Earth Day is a Communist plot through the magic of calendrical coincidence:

Why is it the green agenda is so compatible with socialism and incompatible with personal freedom?

The answer is quite simple. Apparently the first Earth Day was chosen to coincide with the 100th anniversary of Vladimir Lenin’s birth, a man whose very existence was dedicated to the eradication of personal freedom for everyone but himself.

 It's interesting that as "proof", Lewis links to Wikipedia. Hmm, I wonder what information Wikipedia might have on Earth Day? Great Kalinin's Ghost!

Nelson chose the date in order to maximize participation on college campuses for what he conceived as an "environmental teach-in". He determined the week of April 19–25 was the best bet as it did not fall during exams or spring breaks. Moreover, it did not conflict with religious holidays such as Easter or Passover, and was late enough in spring to have decent weather. More students were likely to be in class, and there would be less competition with other mid-week events—so he chose Wednesday, April 22.

That Socialist bastard, trying not to conflict with Easter or spring break! Just read his comment about the timing of the day in his epic Marxist tome:

The date aroused the suspicions of the conservative John Birch society... which perceived some sinister communist plot was under way... the society charged that the event was "Sen Nelson's ill-concealed attempt to honor the 100th anniversary of the birth of Lenin." Obviously, the John Birch Society was better informed about Lenin than I was.

Incidentally, WND, what kind of good conservative publication puts out op-eds coinciding with Lenin's birthday? J'accuse, Uncle Joe Farah.

- Tom Tancredo is nervous because Latinos still identify as Latinos. No, really.

A recent Pew Hispanic Center report, “When Labels Don’t Fit,” shows that the 50 million Americans of Hispanic descent have some huge gaps still to bridge if assimilation to American society is to be achieved. It obviously has not been achieved yet for an alarming number of Hispanics into the third generation. 

...Probably the most important item to emerge from the Pew poll is that 51 percent of the 50 million Americans of Hispanic origin still identify primarily with their country of origin, and only 21 percent use the term “American” to describe themselves. Some might say the silver lining is that this identification as an American increases dramatically from only 8 percent among first generation immigrants to 48 percent by the third generation. 

But if only 48 percent of third-generation Hispanic adults describe themselves as Americans first and Peruvians or Mexicans or Cubans second, can anyone say that assimilation is working well for Hispanic immigrants? That glass is clearly not half full. Shouldn’t we expect that third-generation number to be closer to 90 percent? 

To put the question in perspective, would anyone have been alarmed in 1935 if a similar poll had revealed that only 48 percent of U.S.-born third-generation Germans or third-generation Italians identified themselves as Americans? Don’t we expect assimilation to accomplish more than that? 

Apparently YOU do, Tom. All I really need is people to follow the law and be able to communicate. How they "identify" is neither my business nor particularly my problem. I guess I'm just libertarian that way. Incidentally, I love that you're looking at all of this in a total vacuum as if Latinos are deciding, "Nope, no assimilation for me!" How about the fact that they've been continually held up as poster children for immigration and Americanization failures for the last 15-plus years? I wonder if that could have anything to do with them not feeling 100% American. It's interesting you only mention Germans and Italians. You know what I hear did wonders for Japanese identification as Americans? Internment Camps. Maybe we could try that next.

- Last one and boy is it a doozy. This is the headline that showed up in my email:

THANKS, TEACH: KIDS THINK WE'RE BETTER OFF DEAD
Schools brainwash kids into preferring non-existence

Seriously? This is how slow a news day it was?

A 12-year-old girl has responded with the stunning “I wish we didn’t exist” to questions about how she feels about pollution and humanity’s impact on the earth... 

The response came from a 6th-grade girl identified only as Kalie, from Gault Elementary. Sussman met her during Earth Day events in Santa Cruz, Calif., recently, where he traveled to ask “What is the most serious threat facing mankind?”

....“How many other youngsters like Kalie have been led to believe that the human species should be eliminated?” he wondered.

Ok, first of all, non-existence is not the same thing as being dead. Example: Dino-Lincoln, a re-animated T-Rex with Abraham Lincoln's brain who goes around solving mysteries, does not exist. Ronald Reagan, by contrast, is dead. See the difference? The girl is expressing her desire for a hypothetical, not a death wish. Second, it's a little hard for me to take this bit of "news" seriously given that it's part of a puff piece promoting a silly anti-green documentary by my childhood weatherman-turned-conservative-muckraker.

Look Brian, you're entitled to be a conservative crank if that floats your boat. But I know you. I spent the better part of a decade listening to you in the car on the way to school. And when it comes to discussing important matters like concerning wave of eco-nihilism endangering pre-teens everywhere, my first news source isn't going to be the guy who couldn't predict rain on a stormy day.