Come on down to Crazy Town

I don't visit WND much anymore, mostly for my blood pressure. The few times a month I traipse back, hoping against hope they may have become more sane (ok, not really), I get a stark reminder that they're not just conservative, they're downright nuts.

For example: WND's editor, Joe Farah, likes to tout how much he's a real Christian and believes in Biblical prophecy. He also has a major Judeophile crush on us Hebrews. He also is a complete business huckster who never passes up a chance to plug whatever new thing he's selling.

Cue this monstrosity:

Sept. 17, 2001, marked the beginning of the economic calamity associated with 9/11 with the lowering of interest rates by the Fed resulting in the collapse of the stock market. Seven years later, on Sept. 29, 2008, the next big stock market crash followed – bigger than the previous one – resulting in an economic crisis that continues to this day. 

What does all that have to do with today, Sept. 15? 

It’s Sept. 15 on the Gregorian calendar, but it is Elul 29 on the Hebrew calendar. And both of those previous economic calamities occurred on Elul 29.

Ok, who's been talking to Farah about the Hebrew calendar? Clearly someone told him about that silly (and debunked) tradition that everything bad happens on Tisha B'Av, and now he's rolling with this mishegoss.

But fear not! Joe doesn't actually think that something terrible is going to happen just because it's Elul 29.

The good news is that today is not a Shmitah year on the Hebrew calendar. 

Huh?

On Elul 29 on Shmitah years, the financial accounts are wiped away, debts are canceled and the land is to be given a Sabbath rest, according to Deuteronomy 15:1-2 and Leviticus 25:3-6, with Elul 29 being the last day of the civil calendar year.

Hold it right there, Joe! I know where you're going with this, and... NOOOO.

The next Shmitah year will end Sept. 13, 2015. And, because of the unprecedented popularity of the No. 1 bestselling Christian book in America this year, “The Harbinger,” and the No. 1 bestselling faith movie in America in 2012, “The Isaiah 9:10 Judgment,” some people are already marking their calendars.

Are these by any chance the same people who bought TVs and computers before Y2K expecting all the credit card records to be wiped out?

Jonathan Cahn, a messianic rabbi and author of “The Harbinger,” and the narrator of “The Isaiah 9:10 Judgment,” is the person who first noticed that America’s two great financial shakings occurred on successive Hebrew Shmitah years following the 9/11 Islamist terror attacks on the U.S., the key to the series of limited judgments the author sees as a result of America’s turning away from God just as ancient Israel did before the dispersion.

Of course he does. 

“A clear pattern has been established,” says Joseph Farah, producer of “The Isaiah 9:10 Judgment.” 

Of course you are!

“I don’t believe it’s a coincidence what happened in America on Elul 29 in 2001 and 2008. It would be foolish to ignore the possibility that a greater judgment might be in the works – especially if America continues to move away from God and His Word.”

Almost as foolish as reading an ancient legal procedure meant to promote economic justice and early land management as a financial curse sent by God for not voting Republican?

If that doesn't convince you that God's about to kick some ass, fear not! The messianic rabbis also have the stars on their side. They think.

It’s also worth noting that Elul 29, 2015, represents the eve of the Feast of Trumpets or Rosh Hashana at sundown. An unusual astronomical phenomenon, a blood red moon – or tetrad – is expected to occur that evening, according to NASA. The Feast of Trumpets begins a period known by Jews as “the days of awe” that lasts through Yom Kippur a week later. 

Hebrew roots pastor Mark Biltz of El Shaddai Ministries in Washington state noted several years ago that a cluster of tetrads will occur in 2014 and 2015 – all of them on Hebrew high holidays. There won’t be any more for the rest of the 21st century. 

Joel 2:31 says: “The sun shall be turned into darkness, and the moon into blood, before the great and terrible day of the LORD come.” Other biblical references can be found in Acts 2:20 and Revelation 6:12.

Ok, first of all, the ancient prophets weren't super savvy about the natural sciences. Hell, the rabbis of the Talmud who came along thousands of years later still thought that salamanders were made from fire and that lice came from sweat. Just because Joel talks about the sun going black and the moon going red doesn't mean he's predicting tetrads. And besides, why focus on the moon? Why not scream doomsday every time there's an eclipse? At least then the law of averages might be more in your favor. I'm sure there's bound to be some terrible things that have happened on eclipses over the years.

Whether or not anything significant occurs of a prophetic nature Sept. 13, 2015, Farah said he is immensely pleased with the documentary treatment of the message found in the best-selling book “The Harbinger” by Jonathan Cahn, which has remained on the New York Times bestsellers list for all of 2012. 

“If you haven’t seen this movie yet, I urge you to get it, screen it with your family, show it to your friends and arrange church viewings,” said Farah. “This is the most important project I have been involved in through my 35-year media career. This is a message, I believe, God directed me to be involved with for a time such as this.”

Nice covering your butt there. "The apocalypse and/or total financial ruin is going to happen in three years, so buy all my crap talking about it. Then again, it could totally not happen, but you should probably buy my crap anyway just to be safe." Well played. Oh, and something about shmitah. And tetrads.