Let's all be Dicks

If there's one thing everyone can relate to, it's the timeless art of one-up-manship. This is reflected even in the Orthodox world- there's always a pecking order and someone's always on the bottom. Sephardic Jews hated German Jews, who hated Russian Jews, who hated Hungarian Jews. Everyone in Israel hates the Ethiopian Jews. Chabad hates Satmar, Satmar hates everybody, and Bobov, once among the sanest of sects, hates itself.

What's really great, though, is when this intense desire to elevate yourself at someone else's expense is made possible thanks to the efforts of someone else. Say, telling some random Indian guy that out of all the cool Indians, he's the coolest because he's really a lost Tribe of Israel.

Let's go to the text:

although other Indians hate to admit, it has always been known that the Cherokee has been blessed with gifted minds; that is also a result of our tribal roots in ancient Israel

Hey, that's just awesome. Next we should try to incite some gang warfare in India by telling them that one particular caste is descended from the Kohens- only we won't say which one.

*Shuffles off to brain himself with a peace pipe.*