WND Hoisted on its own stupidity

WND finally gets some comeuppance as it attempts to sell yet more crap.

Seems they had a not entirely accurate ad a few days ago:

When they arrived in America in 1620, the most precious cargo the Pilgrims carried with them was the Bible.

Really? I thought it was guns, food and clothing. No wonder they needed Squanto to save their butts.

Have you ever wondered which version of the Bible they brought to America on the Mayflower?

I can safely say, "No". Was it the highly inaccurate King James?

There was the King James Version of 1611, but there was an earlier version – one not sanctioned by the government – the 1599 Geneva Bible, a forgotten yet priceless treasure.

Also crappy hats with belt buckles on them, but our manufacturer's out of stock on those, so buy a Bible.

The Geneva Bible is unique among all other Bibles. It was the first Bible to use chapters and numbered verses and became the most popular version of its time because of the extensive marginal notes. These notes, written by Reformation leaders such as John Calvin, John Knox, Miles Coverdale, William Whittingham, Anthony Gilby, and others, were included to explain and interpret the scriptures for the common people.

Oh, I get it. Sort of like the Talmud, except only some people's opinions were important enough to get into the canon, and if you disagreed with the interpretations, you got burned as a witch. Actually it's exactly like the Talmud, come to think of it. No wonder people switched to the King James. Also, go transparent religious populism!

For nearly half a century these notes helped the people of England, Scotland, and Ireland understand the Bible and true liberty.

What?

King James despised the Geneva Bible because he considered the notes on key political texts to be seditious and a threat to his authority. Unlike the King James Version, the Geneva Bible was not authorized by the government. It was truly a Bible by the people and for the people. You can see why this remarkable version with its profound marginal notes played a key role in the formation of the American Republic.

Um... what?

Now 407 years after its original publication, this wonderful version of the Bible has been resurrected.

And it's available to you now for the low price of only 59.95. That's three payments of 19.95, or six payments of 10.95, or eight payments of your firstborn son. We're flexible. Go ahead, read the unauthorized Bible, get inspired, tell your friends about freedom. Lead a rebellion or two. Go nuts.
But wait! Seems there's a bit of a problem here. According to random WND reader Joey Faust (a great if suspicious name), WND's full o' crap. Let's read on, shall we?

I wonder how many "Thanksgiving sermons" contained a sentence or two that stated that the early Pilgrims who came over on the Mayflower did NOT possess or use the Authorized Version (King James)? These preachers have simply repeated what they have heard from others.

Yes, Google is a bit of a double-edged sword. Old Joe found a mention in the Pilgrim Hall Museum that says they also had a King James. Oops.

The early Pilgrims had both versions! Although the AV was new at the time, it would quickly outshine them all and become the cornerstone of civilization in the New World.

Sure it would.

According to Mr. Faust, while Plymouth liked Geneva, a bunch of other colonies preferred the King James. Of course, maybe if they'd been allowed to read something else without being stoned for it, other books might have been more popular. Ye Olde Juggs, perhaps. Or the Idiot's Guide to Surviving Indian Raids.

The rest, as Joey puts it, is history.

The AV would soon become "Our Version," and its fruit and authority in the lives of American Christians has been thoroughly documented elsewhere.

If by American Christians you mean Protestants. Which I guess you do.

Therefore, when your children ask you, "What meaneth this black Book? Why do I have to sit still in church as this old, black Book is read and preached?" we must answer that this Holy Bible was here from the start!

Um, actually, I'm pretty sure the first question should be, "Why are you talking like a Puritan?" And you just established that there were at least two Bibles that were here from the start. I'm confused.

It is God's Book.

Along with how many others?

It soon outshined all other versions.

I don't know; if we're going by sheer popularity it seems like the Qu'ran is getting up there.

They decreased and it increased; and so did our nation as long as it believed, honored and obeyed this Holy Bible.

Especially the killing rebellious sons part. Those were the days.

So in conclusion, I hope you all understand that best-sellers equal books that God likes. So what if the Da Vinci Code AND Left Behind are both popular? It just proves God's schizophrenic.

I wonder what it would be like if people didn't try to prove religious validity via pseudo-historical arguments like which Bible "got here first"? Oh yes, that's right- far less interesting.

We salute you, Farah and Faust. Go get light-sabers and fight it out.