Monday, March 06, 2006

Israel: Money is over-rated

Yediot took a poll the other day on which personalities Israelis would want on their currency if the bills were to be redesigned.

Apparently most Israelis really don't give a shit. (18%, a clear majority!)

The results:
  • Ariel Sharon, 15%. This is a great idea; this way around half the country will start burning all their money. I have a thought- maybe the state should try compensating all the former Katif-ers in new Sharon-shekels. "Sorry, Shlomo. This is all we have. Take it or leave it."
  • Yitzhak Rabin, 13.5%. The only person slightly more controversial than Sharon. Also the only person less photogenic (although at least you'd be able to fit all of Rabin's face in the shot...)
  • A four way tie at 11%, between Ovadia Yosef, Yitzhak Kaduri, Maimonides, and A.I. Kook. Yes, good ol' "God sent Katrina because he hates black people" Yosef. Sorry, I meant, "Ashkenazim are the root of all evil" Yosef. Nope, that's not it. "Holocaust victims were the souls of sinners" Yosef? Maybe that's the one. And Kaduri? Please. No one even knew about him, much less cared, until he was dead. I guess that's the price you pay for not being the odious "spiritual leader" of a political party (cough-cough, Yosef). Am I the only one who thinks this four-way-tie is more than a little insulting to the Rambam? Where's the outrage?
  • Menachem Begin, 7.9%. Nuff said.
  • David Ben-Gurion, 4.5%. Close behind was David Beckham, with 4%. Maybe we could have them both on the bill? A "Dave & Dave" shekel?
  • Silvan Shalom, Amir Peretz and Shimon Peres, 2.5%. The same amount of those polled said they would rather see a member of their family on the bill.
  • Lastly, Theodore Herzl, Golda Meir, Rehavam Ze’evi, 1%. What? How the hell are those first two even in the same category as Ze'evi? And Meir was a freaking head-of-state who actually had significant accomplishments while in office! And Herzl?? Herzl was the frigging founder of political Zionism! How do you not have Herzl on your money, Israel? He gets a stamp, but not a bill? Come on.
So, to recap- Israelis have about the same fondness for David Ben-Gurion as David Beckham, and would rather see their uncle Moishy on a bill than Theodore Herzl.

Rock on, Sabras.


Incidentally, some of you might be wondering who Israel actually DOES have on its currency:

A short list from The Bank of Israel website:

  • Maimonides (1 N.S.)
  • Levi Eshkol (5 N.S.)
  • Moshe Sharret (20 N.S.)
  • S.Y. Agnon (50 N.S.)
  • Yitzhak Ben-Zvi (100 N.S.)
  • Zalman Shazar (200 N.S.)
That's right, such notables as Moshe "Hitler does my mustache" Sharret, and Zalman "Who?" Shazar, apparently trump David Ben-Gurion, who hasn't been on a bill that was legal tender since 1984. I'm sure wherever Dave is at the moment, he's pissed. And short.

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